I didn't even plant anything.....

Ok, fair warning...these pictures are kinda gross. Not bloody or oosing or ( ok descriptions are NOT helping, sorry) but they are of my feet. Not that my feet are uber gross, but it's my winter non-pedicurized  feet with a wart so....yea. If you aren't interested you might want to come back tomorrow, I totally will not be mad at you.

How I removed my Plantars Wart with 

Essential Oils

A few weeks ago I began to notice that my foot was hurting, and it seemed like it was hurting only in one spot. I usually just wear socks around the house and Hubby thought maybe it was because I was standing without support and that I needed some slippers to ease the pain. The slippers helped for a little of the pain, but I noticed that it was starting to hurt more and more. It was then that I actually looked and noticed a little, hard spot right in the middle of the pad. Weird. 

I honestly just thought it was a callus so I ignored it, for a few more days....then the pain got worse. Hubby and I were debating back and forth over what it could be ( by now it was a slightly larger, hard little callus) I said it was just a callus, Hubby said it was more. How do you solve this? The internet of course! We did a little research and found out that it's a normal callus if it hurts when you press down on it, but it's a plantars wart when it hurts when you squeeze it. So we squeezed and I *might* have said a few unladylike things, it hurt...bad.

I was mortified. I NEVER got warts. How did one get a plantars wart??I haven't planted! Things just continued to get better when Hubby told me what the common treatment was....urine. Apparently that will get the pesky little wart right off....NOPE. I was not about to pee on my foot, I was irritated enough at having the stupid thing. So what did I do? Pulled out my essential oils of course!

This is my routine:

1. I wiped LEMON essential oil all over the area to sanitize it.

2. Then I began a daily regiment of putting one drop of MELALEUCA on the cloth part of a band-aid and 

putting it directly on the wart.

3. I would change the band-aid out 2-3 times a day putting a fresh one on with the one drop of melaleuca.

4. After just three days I noticed it was literally eating the wart out of my skin. PS-100% PAIN FREE this did not hurt, it was eating at the wart not my skin. I could literally begin to put my fingernail under it and begin to pry it up but I didn't pull it out then. 

5. On day five the wart had turned into a hard little seed shaped thing and was starting to be painful to walk on so I just pulled a little ( where the melaleuca had been eating it away ) and out it came. Totally pain free! I could walk on it with no problems. I was SO happy!!

You can see on day seven my skin was already beginning the process of healing and covering the dent where the wart was. I can walk perfectly fine on my feet now, totally pain free!

This is the little bugger, completely eaten off my skin. 

It oddly looks like a little seed and it's as hard as a rock. 

Not fun. 

So there it is. That's how I got rid of mine. I'd be happy to answer any questions or hear from you guys about any wart experiences. I have never in my life been more thankful for my essential oils 

as I was when that stupid wart was removed. Also, as always if you 

shop with Spark Naturals for your essential oils 

be sure to use coupon code " Bubble" to save 

10% off your whole order! 

Once Upon A Time....

Sit down little children and let me tell you a story. Once upon a time there was a beautiful, smart, funny, adorable, charming, wonderful, lovely...uhm...modest Queen. She lived with a handsome, charming King and a darling, sweet tiny little munchkin tornado in a quaint little modular home.

The Queen lived a wonderful life and adapted very easily into her role of a stay at home munchkin tornado wrangler. She adapted so well that she rarely had any clothes piled up or crumbs on the floor, and she did this all without the help of little singing pudgy mice.

The Queen only had one little hangup and that was the small habit of leaving things in her oven overnight to finish drying. It really hadn't been a problem before. She simply put dishes in the automatic dishwasher and whatever was left was cleaned by hand and stuck in the oven to dry. The next day she awoke to clean, dry dishes ready to be put up in their places. This system worked well for the Queen and all the people in the land of modular homes were happy.

At least until the King decided to make breakfast one morning and turned the oven on to 400 degrees ( without checking it for dishes) and let that puppy go.

The King had turned his back to the oven to begin making biscuits when flames began rolling out from the oven. The Queen awoke to the wonderful sounds of their smoke alarms blaring. She raced to the kitchen in time to see her husband put out the fire and race past her holding an oven rack covered with the melted white goo of plastic.

The Queen despite all odds broke into a hysterical laughing fit...until she saw the king's face. The king wavered from happiness because they were all alive and still able to live in their little modular home and wanting to strangle the lovely yet apparently forgetful Queen.

As the black soot settled on the counter tops (and fridge, sink, cabinets, pantry...really...I could go on..) the Queen vowed to never leave anything in the oven ever again and took the family out to a nice breakfast at the royal International House Of Pancakes.

So dear children if you find yourself visiting a friend's home and see the charred and gooey ( now hard as a brick) remains of plastic melted onto an oven rack on your friend's front porch try not to judge because one day it just might be you who almost burned the kingdom to the ground.

Damn plastic bowl....

Judgiest Fortune Cookie Ever

 

Yea I know fortune cookie, but you know what sometimes crap happens. 

Stop judging me with your stupid double smiley faces.

The great equalizer

Maybe it's just me being weird, and having what I expect is a slight case of anxiety cat syndrome, but I feel like I'm constantly being judged in the women's room.

Not just me though, I feel like whenever there is another person ( or God forbid like a pack of them) in the women's room they're all judging me and one another too. I imagine exactly what they're thinking of me when they're standing in front of the mirror touching up their makeup or washing their hands.

She was in there a while...I bet she pooped...ew..who poops?

Her hair is SO frizzy...hello...keratin treatment duh

What the hell is she wearing? Is that a stain? 

Flip flops are so last season


See? Anxiety, and you might think I'm totally making this up, but I'm pretty sure it happens every time I'm in there with someone else. Just think about the last time you were in the bathroom and some crazy pants lady came out of the stall while you were washing your hands, you totally began judging her and guess what...to some people you're their crazy pants, but that's ok. That's ok, because you know what's the great equalizer?

The automatic hand dryer.

Yup, the high speed one. This afternoon I was standing next to a friggen suntan lotion model and feeling like the troll in The Three Billy Goats Gruff ( or the goats, take your pick)and trying to look semi-confident in the mirror when she went to dry her hands and I politely waited my turn. It was then that I noticed it.


The automatic hand dryer levels us all my friends. No matter how perfect you or your hands are it pushes and smooshes the skin in ways that will knock you down a few pegs sister, and the sounds! The tooting noises would keep a teenage boy in stitches for weeks. It is wonderful, and I will forever be grateful for the wonderful makers of this thing who both save the planet and my confidence, one bathroom trip at a time.

Limits: sometimes you find yours the hard way.

Well if you've been reading my blog at all this past month you know I've embarked on a journey of "going green" in all the ways that I possibly can, especially when it comes to the food we eat and the chemicals, and medicines we use. Actually, I take that back...I hate the term " going green" it makes me think of the flu or little aliens capturing my body. Maybe Modern Hippie? Pioneer-ing? Modern Old-World-ing? Wellness Cleaning? Danggit...I need a term for this.

Anyway, I digress. 

It was Sunday afternoon when I came upon the term "Oil Pulling". Have you heard of it? It's suppose to cleanse your mouth, pull toxins, and even whiten teeth naturally using oil, like my beloved coconut oil. Basically you wake up in the morning, put some in your mouth, swish it around for about fifteen minutes,
spit it out, then brush your teeth and walla! Healthier, cleaner mouth! I read some reviews, looked it up on tons of websites and resolved to try it in the morning.

So I woke up today, opened my jar of coconut oil, scooped a little out and then put it into my mouth. The minute I had it in my mouth ( still in a fairly solid chunk) my gag reflex kicked up, but no..that was not going to deter me. I rationalized that I was gagging because it was still solid so I began trying to melt it with my tongue and move it around...big mistake. I began dry heaving all over the bathroom, I gripped the sink and tried to let it pass, but no...this was not going to happen.

I leaned over the sink and the second before spitting it all out I remembered reading something about it clogging sinks ( because it goes back to a solid form) and so I lunged for the trash can and tripped over Rhett ( our new kitten) who apparently had been watching this whole debacle, and when I tripped some of the oil when down my throat which made me cough and gag it all up over the floor.

So there I sat this morning, trying to soothe a freaked out kitten ( who had an odd look on his face like...good Lord, why did I have to get adopted by the weirdos?), and cleaning up half solidified, puked up coconut oil. I am all for natural healing, but know your limits people.


( If you want more info on this you can check it out HERE at Wellness Mama or  HERE at Swanson Vitamins )

And that is how I became a caterer for a weekend.

Alright so for those of you who might not know: my Hubby runs the maintenance side of a summer camp. Awesome right? Right. Well a few months ago his partner (who runs the booking/scheduling side) left to take over another job and this left Hubby working both positions which is usually something he can handle but for this group he couldn't use the caterer that the camp usually uses because the group was only 23 people ( the normal guy won't cook for any group less than 25). This is where that part of our marriage that the term "partnership" got thrown around and long story short I ended up cooking for them ( totally by myself) while my amazing, awesome, fantabulistic sister watched Munchkin all weekend long (by herself) for the first time. Needless to say this past weekend was a very humbling one for everyone involved.

Let me just share a few facts:
1. The kitchen utilities have been in service longer than my mother has been alive.
2. I have not once turned on a stove in that kitchen prior to Friday morning (AKA: first breakfast for the group)
3. I have never cooked for a group of people larger than seven.

This is basically how things played out:


  1. ( Thursday Night)
Hey....you've got this. You're a great cook! You've cooked for lots of people, they love your food. You'll be fine, it's only three days. You've got this tiger!







2. (Friday Morning)
UGH. Why am I up at 4 a.m.? Who eats breakfast at 6:15?!? Ok, pull it together, let's do this.....set up the waffle griddles, make the mix, this is easy. No problem. Maybe I really can do this.



 

3. ( Still Breakfast)
OH MY GOD! Why are the griddles not hot?!? What happened? I swear I turned them on, they were on and now they're not. What is going on? Oh good lord I tripped a breaker!!! The coffee maker, the warmer, the cooler and both griddles are off! Why? Why did I volunteer for this?! Where is the breaker? Where is another outlet?!?!



And I really could have used someone like Wanda Sykes to just be like:

 

 

   4. (After fixing the breaker and moving griddles) OK.OK. You've gotten the worst out of the way, it's easy peasy from here baby. No worries, just keep making waffles and let's start on that bacon. 

5. ( Halfway through making breakfast)
What demon bacon is this!!? It's burning in seconds and tearing apart! Why?!? I hate you Smithfield. I hate you so much. PLEASE just cook normally and stop splitting and just be normal!What evil pig did you come from? We're halfway through this and I will not be under-minded by bacon!






6. ( Thirty minutes until breakfast)
Wait...I need more waffle mix. Uh-oh. I'm out. Like....out.out. Like there is no more mix and that means I cannot make any more waffles and OH MY GOD why did I even try this?? How did I run out!!?!? Oh no..how many is that total??  I give up, I give up. Mark my words...I GIVE UP!








7. (Twenty minutes until breakfast)
* Hubby walks in while I am frantically counting waffles and tells me everything is fine and to calm down *











8. We hastily figure out that everyone can have one waffle and most will be able to have seconds. Get drinks,fruit, cereals, and sides out. Group starts to line up and I put on my best smile making the plates and passing them out.







9. ( After Breakfast is served)
Thank the LORD! HALLELUJAH! I made it!! One breakfast down!





That is how it went word for word, emotion for emotion. It honestly got a lot better as the weekend progressed and it helped that this group was the most fantastic, wonderful group I could have asked for. They were super nice and one wonderful lady and her son brought me flowers because she has cooked for groups and knows how stressful it can be. Towards the end I got the art of timing down a little more and things got a little easier plus I did have help on the last breakfast service, and Hubby helped for dinners. All in all it was certainly a learning experience. I have a whole new appreciation for caterers I can promise you that.

Beacuse I'm the weirdo who develops allergies at the age of 26 that's why.

The other day my little family had decided to visit a produce market and we got a few peaches, apples, some squash and blueberries.Yesterday I was telling Hubby about how excited I was to put them in a cobbler and I grabbed about four of the peaches and held them to my face to inhale their delicious aroma. A little weird maybe, but harmless right? WRONG.

I poured a glass of tea, and sat on the couch watching Munchkin play in the floor. I texted a friend of mine, about 15 minutes had passed and then suddenly my face started itching. I rubbed it a little, not too worried and then it felt like someone had set it one fire. I ran to the bathroom, washed my face and tried not to scratch it off. I looked into the mirror and had huge welts on my face, my lips were swollen and hives were spreading all over it. I ran back in the living room and screamed something at Hubby about my face being on fire and what the heck is going on. He calmly looked me over and said it was an allergic reaction and what the heck did I put to my face.

After taking two benadryl tablets we finally figured out it must have been the peaches. I didn't think it was possible so what is the normal reaction to deduce this problem? Rub it on my wrist of course! So Hubby does just that and of course within five minutes my wrist is red, swollen, broken out and burning. Hubby is getting concerned, I'm wailing about not being able to eat peach cobbler again and then my throat starts swelling.

Hubby wanted to take me into the ER asap, but I was like "Dude, we don't have health insurance, and it's just one side of my throat so chill" which of course he did not. So there we were with Munchkin trying to figure out why mommy had a bag of peas pressed to her face, Daddy was hovering over mommy like a hawk and asking " Are you OK? Is it any worse?" a million times and mommy simultaneously waving him away and crying about Chick-Fil-A's peach milkshake.

It was eventful to say the least.

I woke up today with itchy hives still on my face and wrist. We thought about it though and I haven't had one peach since giving birth to Munchkin. The Dr. had said that my body would change and I totally expected the stretch marks, but peaches?!? Glorious, southern, sweet peaches!?!?!! I guess I should be thankful it's nothing like dairy or chocolate, but it still sucks. I did wash those peaches before I put them in the bowl FYI, and Hubby rubbed them on himself plus earlier that day Munchkin had been playing with them, and they both had eaten them so it's definitely me.

 I've never had an allergy, I've never had to watch what I ate and what I was around.

Like today I was feeding Munchkin one of those squeeze fruit pouches and without thinking I got some on the pouch and licked it off and then I went into panic mode about possibly having peaches in it. It's just so strange. So yea, I now have a friggen peach allergy. awesome.

Now if you'll excuse me while I go delete everything "peach" off my Pinterest board.