Exciting and terrifying news

OH MY GOSH you guys, one of my absolute most favorite southern authors is visiting my library ( quite literally ten minutes from my house). The amazingly talented and hilarious Celia Rivenbark will literally be in the same room as me come December the fifth, plus the event is free and will have coffee. It is literally the perfect storm of awesomeness. My reaction to this news quiet literally went like this:

1. Excitement

OH my Gosh, OH my Gosh, OH my Gosh. This is so cool and wonderful I've never met an author before, and she's SO funny and....I've....never...met..an author before.

2. Apprehension

What would I say? "Hi, I like...you?" Yea, that totally doesn't sound creepy at all. What if I get there and then go all introvert and just stand there staring, I don't want to be the weird girl in the corner staring!

3. Fear

OH MY GOSH what if it's small and intimate ( of course it is, our library is the size of a tennis court) and she actually comes over and tries to talk to me and I can't think of one thing to say to her and panic and half shout something from Once Upon A Time.

Her: " So are you from here?"

Me: " Magic comes with a price Dearie!!"

Sure she writes about getting pink eye before her high school reunion but she's an accomplished, talented author for heaven's sake. I'm the woman who just cleaned puppy puke off the carpet and prayed the coffee stain on the couch isn't too noticeable.

----- Hubby stepped in and said to just get something signed, tell her you're a fan and leave ----

Ok, smart idea and maybe if the group is large enough I can still lurk and listen to the normal people who ask her really interesting and smart things. Then I got to thinking...I buy all of her books on the kindle...I don't HAVE anything for her to sign.

4. Panic

Should I ask her to sign my kindle? Would that be too weird? I know it would be weird, but I'm just

wondering about the level of weirdness. It has a cover, but oh Lord the cover looks like a toddler ran it through the blender with a pound of dirt which actually is mostly true.

5. Bargaining

Maybe buy another one of her books so she could sign it? But then it would look new, and she could totally tell I had just bought it plus cheap Hubby would never go for that. I began racking my brain....a bookmark? my essential oil journal? Oh God...this was getting bad.

 So then Hubby again steps in and says that he once got Dale Earnhardt JR to sign a cooler and duffle bag, so in comparison a kindle really isn't that odd. I still don't know, seems a little too weird to me, I have this sneaky suspiscion it's going to turn out a lot like this:


,   y'all pray for me.