Thursday, October 24, 2013

And this is how you know you're officially a mom.

Yesterday was mine and Hubby's three year wedding anniversary, though we've been together for a whopping ten years.TEN...crazy right? was a nice day, he got me six more essential oils I've been wanting, and a new wallet, and I got him an assortment of hunting paraphernalia. My lovely sister watched Munchkin while we went out to dinner, and later we decided to stop at Target.

I realized when we walked in that it was actually the first time we had went shopping together in a store without our little angel. It was crazy how excited I was. We were taking our time looking at everything and spending time just standing and comparing things which I know to people who don't have kids might seem really weird, but to those of you who totally know what I'm talking about.

Usually our shopping trip goes like this:

3:00 - At the house
Me: " Alright, I've packed everything in her diaper bag that we could need...are you ready? I have a's only a few things, we shouldn't be long."
Hubby: " Yep I'm ready, I'll get Munchkin in the car....she'll be fine."

3:15 - Arrive at store
Me: " Ok sweetie...let's sit you in the cart."
Munch: "UUUHHHH UUHHHHH" * kicks feet, cries* MOOOMMMMAAAAA
Hubby: " big deal, I'll hold her."
Me: * brave smile * " harm done...happy girl ok?"
Munch: * claps hands and acts happy *

3:25 - Shopping for a grand total of ten minutes
Munch: * cries and rolls in Hubby's arms like an alligator demanding to be put down *
Hubby: " No sweetheart, it's a snack." * bribes with Lucky Charms*
Munch: * eats a bite and resolves to sit still for the moment* 
Me: * getting a little worried *  " Hey babe...which one of these did we like last time? "
* picks up two, trying to compare labels*

3:27 - Same isle
Munch: * starts screaming and throwing snacks *
Me: " Let me hold her...look want some juice?" * grab munchkin who is still fussing*
Hubby: " I don't know...I don't care....just grab something"
Me: " Maybe she wants a toy...hand me a toy"
Hubby: " There is no toy"
Me: " oh crap...I forgot them on the counter"
Munchkin: * fussing and irritated we're standing in one place for too long*
Me: " I just can't decide between this one and this one"
Hubby: " Then we'll come back to the isle in a minute, we need to keep moving...what's next?"
Me: " I don't know..where is the list?"
Munchkin: * suspiciously quiet*
Me: " I think she pooped..."
Hubby: "ok...I'll change her you grab whatever is left"

3:31 - Checking out and trying to distract Munchkin with everything in the arsenal
Me: "We're almost done sweetheart..almost going home."
Munchkin:  * crying and throwing whatever she can get her hands on*
Hubby: " I'll pay for everything, take her outside..see if that helps."

3:32 - Taking outside does not help

3:34 - On the way back home, Munchkin still fussing 
Me: " We forgot the tea bags"
Hubby: " screw it"

Yep...that's basically how it goes now. I longingly remember the days where she used to sit in her car seat and was perfectly content with watching people quietly. I've been told it gets better, but I remain skeptical. All I can say is that you know you're a mom when shopping at Target with your Hubby is the highlight of your anniversary. 

1 comment:

  1. Yes, well... it DOES get better, but what nobody else tells you is that the fussing and screaming is replaced with incessant begging and whining punctuated by threats from you to withhold the promised treat (yes there is bribery involved, we all do it, just DO NOT give her the treat until she has FINISHED behaving well in the store!!! Because that genie doesn't go back int he bottle. Nuh-Uh.)